Thursday, April 9, 2015

If you Give Owen a Minute

If you give Owen a minute then he will want 5 more after that.
If you give him 5 minutes he will want to books read to him during that time.
While you are reading the two books he will see something in the books 
that he wants to research.
Then you will go on the internet or YouTube and research whatever it is that has Owen fascinated.
While you are researching he will see something that makes him want to do a project.
So you will then look up on the internet a cool and fun project that you can do together.
As soon as he starts the project and you try to load the dishwasher while he works,
he will remind you that you are supposed to be doing the project with him.
Now that the project is done and another a sufficient mess is made he will want you to go watch a show with him.
During that 30 minute show you will close your eyes for approximately 30 seconds before he jumps on your head because you are supposed to be watching with him.
The show will remind him that he is hungry and you will make him lunch. 
While he is eating lunch you will return to loading the dishwasher,
while your back is turned he will spill his milk yet another mess for you to clean up.
While you are cleaning up the lunch mess he is asking you to go downstairs and watch him
while he builds bionicles with hero factory pieces because he is afraid to be
downstairs alone.
While you are downstairs Owen will decide it is wrestle time because you picked up all the legos that were on the floor making plenty of room for a rumble.
When he is losing the match he will say he needs help and remind you that it is time to go pick up
Luke from school.
After you have picked up Luke from school and Owen has fallen asleep for that 4 minute car ride
he will wake up and want all of your attention because he is so grumpy.
He will spend the next 40 minutes begging  you for cake which you do not give him because if  you give him cake he will want milk to go with it and you can only handle one glass of spilled milk in a four hour span.
Once you have won the battle of wills for cake he will curl up in your lap until he has
taken all the physical interaction he wants from you.
Then he will run off to play with his brother.
You quickly finish throwing dinner together before a fight ensues.
When the fight ensues you distract and acknowlege both sides while praying it ends quickly.
You feed them all dinner, you run them to their respective practices while Owen never shuts up in the back seat about his need for cake.
You finally get home past bedtime, throw him in the tub until he has another argument with Luke.
You wrestle him into his pajamas, you brush his teeth with one hand while pinning him still with the other. 
You read two books, you pray the Hail Mary (he knows all the words but still wants prompted)
you kiss him goodnight and turn on the music. Then he asks for one more minute...
and when you give him one more minute he'll want 5 to go with it.
He got cheese, but no cake.

Notice the dishwasher is still not loaded or closed.

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