...to do the right thing? That is the question Beau is asking over and over right now. He has determined he knows what the right thing to do is, but it is so hard to not do the wrong thing. The right thing is to get in the shower when mom tells me to, the wrong thing is to go back to playing...so instead I hear him whimpering whining talking to himself sitting in his bean bag completely distraught. He knows what is right and he doesn't want to do what is wrong because he doesn't want to get in trouble, but he really wants to play. I don't even know where to begin in this conversation of making the hard choice because it is right.
He came out of school today with his pant leg ripped from ankle to upper thigh. His whole leg was sticking out, I was horrified to say the least. When I questioned him about it he said there was a small hole that he continued to pull at until his whole leg was hanging out of his pants. It apparently happened at the very end of the day, thank goodness. In the car he said he knew it was wrong, but he couldn't help himself. UGH!! How I hated hearing that. Self-control, self-control, self-control, we have come so far, but obviously we have a ways to go. I can just imagine how that hole stared at him all day daring him, and then in the final recess it got a little bigger and it stared at him a little harder and he had no self-control left. I can see exactly how it happened and I want to cry for him, having that conscience come alive and really beginning to see right from wrong, what happened my little boy. He is growing and beginning to face the harsh reality of life, we need to choose what is RIGHT all the time especially when it is hard. We need to practice self-control all the time even when we think we have none left, we need to pray for it, we need to look to God to make the hard easy. That is what I intend to teach Beau, but where do I begin. What if I'm not ready? These simple conversations that Beau brings about really are about the bigger things in life, and I don't feel ready. Are you ever ready for the hard things God calls you to do? Was Mary ready? Was Jesus ready? The point I think is to live in a constant state of readiness, but that is oh so hard, I guess the most important is when He asks you say "yes" whether you are ready or not. And to PRAY HARD.